'Absolutely tragic for us': Veteran raising cash for baby memorial garden in memory of his son
Content warning: This article is about the death of a child.
A British Army veteran has taken on the gruelling Three Peaks Challenge and Brighton marathon in one weekend to raise money to fund a baby memorial garden at Gloucester Hospital in memory of his son Charlie who died after being born prematurely.
To help him complete the daunting challenge, former Royal Signals soldier David Lynham joined forces with his father Sean, sister Louise and a group of friends including Ben Crowley, a member of the non-teaching staff from the Attenborough School, a place of learning in Sennelager that caters for military children.
Mr Lynham spoke with BFBS the Forces Station in Germany about why he is raising money for the Cheltenham and Gloucester Hospitals Charity, saying: "Tragically, on 19 December 2022 myself and my partner, Saphron Rogers, we lost our son Charlie Sean Lyneham.
"He was born prematurely at 20 weeks and four days old – it's absolutely tragic for us.
"We're hoping just to raise as much money as we can just to provide a little bit of comfort for any future families who will, unfortunately, go through it and it just provides them a nice place where they can remember their angel babies."
Mr Lynham and his partner Saphron, both of whom served in the Armed Forces, now live in the UK and have a three-year-old daughter.
Speaking with BFBS the Forces Station in Germany, their friend Mr Crowley explained that it was during the Covid-19 lockdown that his childhood friend Mr Lynham and his partner decided to try for another child, saying: "He said watching his child grow up was something that he can't replace and is almost a positive from Covid and they decided they'd like to try and have another baby."
They fell pregnant in 2022 but, 20 weeks into the pregnancy, on 19 December 2022, their son Charlie was born prematurely due to complications.
Mr Crowley said: "For two hours his heart was beating and they were cuddling him and comforting him as best as they could.
"Sadly after that, he passed and, obviously, they were distraught."
Living overseas was hard for Mr Crowley as he wanted to do all he could to help and support his grieving friends David and Saphron.
The family found comfort and support through friends and family members who lived nearby and an idea from Nikki Dobson, a Bereavement Specialist Midwife, that resonated with Mr Lynham.
She told the veteran about a project to create a baby memorial garden in the hospital where Charlie was born, which Mr Lynham wanted to support.
He decided to raise money for it by completing the daunting Three Peaks Challenge, climbing the three tallest mountains in the UK all within 24 hours – Ben Nevis in Scotland, Scafell Pike in England and, finally, Snowdon in Wales.
But that wasn't enough for Mr Lynham, who wanted to go a step further.
Mr Crowley said: "If that... didn't sound tiring enough, David thought, 'you know what, after that we'll drive from Snowdon to Brighton and we'll do the Brighton marathon'."
Former Royal Signals soldier Mr Lynham has completed arduous challenges like Snowdon before while serving in the British Army "but nothing on this scale followed by a marathon".
The initial plan was for Mr Lynham to complete the challenge with just his father, but he later reached out to his friends via a WhatsApp group and asked them to take part as well.
Mr Crowley jumped at the chance before it dawned on him just exactly what he had signed himself up for, saying: "Initially I was like, of course I will, and then I thought 'Three Peaks and a marathon – that is quite daunting'."
It was eventually decided that Mr Lynham would be supported by his friends, father and sister for the Three Peaks Challenge but that the marathon would be completed by just David and his father – Charlie's father and grandfather.
Mr Crowley has been particularly moved by his childhood friend's devastating loss and is keen for as much money to be raised as possible.
He said: "There's never going to be a way to make something like this better and as much as no one should ever have to go through child loss, I think having a baby memorial garden where you can go and meet other people that are in the same position, it gives you a sense that you're not alone in a time which I imagine is horribly lonely.
"It's almost nice to have something that touches your heart and I think this baby memorial garden, once completed, will do that to a lot of families."
Mr Lynham has already reached his initial goal of raising £1,000 for the Cheltenham and Gloucester Hospitals Charity and did so within the first 48 hours of the JustGiving page going live.
The current target is £3,750 and donations can be made by visiting the JustGiving page.
If you or someone you know needs support at this time, find help available on our website.
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