Tri-Service
Fancy A Brew? NATO or Whoopi?
It’s resolutely British. It’s absolutely military. Everyone likes a few moments to stand easy, unwind and have a bit of banter over a brew. There would have been mutiny if NAAFI breaks were targeted as efficiency savings in the tea-strainer that is the government’s Strategic Defence and Security Review.
Indeed, the boost to morale our troops have historically received from a cup of ‘char’ has led to them being allocated more rations of the stuff – as well as special gifts of tea tins from the Royal Family, on occasions such as Christmas or the Jubilee.
They even have their own language for how they take their ‘wet’ (Royal Navy / Royal Marines). Allow us to initiate you:
NATO tea: a bit like builders’ tea being the most common preparation in civvy street, NATO tea comes white with two sugars. It used to arrive in the field from the cookhouse in a catering urn or a ‘Norwegian’ (insulated container – more tales of the ‘Norgie’ to follow…) with the milk and sugar already added, so servicemen and women had no choice. This is standard-issue tea. Consequently, many junior soldiers never learnt to take their beverage any other way.
Other explanations given for this label are, unsurprisingly, laced with squaddie humour:
White and two, Nato brew.
A bloke once told me he’d like a Douglas. I queried, and he replied “Douglas Bader - nay toes!”
NATO - No Added Tea Organic.
Coalition tea: Milk with one sugar (containing one of everything).
Warsaw Pact: Milk with no sugar. Although this preparation is more commonly known as a Julie Andrews, who takes her tea (a drink with jam and bread) in the white, none style. If you’re baffled, think ‘The Sound of Music’, in which Julie Andrews plays Maria, a fair nun.
Following suit and getting in on the ‘Sister Act’, military humour has assigned a beverage served with no milk and no sugar as the Whoopi Goldberg (black, none / nun).
Presumably there are soldiers who’ve thought of adding a splash of Blue Nun to their flask for the long nights in damp ditches or under a flapping tarpaulin…? Definitely not standard issue.
And the online Army Rumour Forum, ARRSE, encourages readers not to forget the Kylie Minogue brew – she’s white with one and a bit, apparently.
Then there are the more exclusive military blends – prime among them being Gunfire Tea: a cocktail made of black tea and rum which was historically served by army officers to the lower ranks before a morning attack. Gunfire is still drunk before a passing out parade and on regimental battle anniversaries.
More accidentally-arrived at special blends resulted from the beverage being carried in the same containers as other battlefield grub. Back in the day, old petrol cans were frequently used as vessels to transport tea to the front line. ARRSE contributors remember their brew coming from a ‘Norgie’ which was last used for range stew. Meaty tea, anyone?
A Coldstream Guards soldier celebrates the Queen's Diamond Jubilee with tea and biscuits from Fortnum & Mason.
It’s been such a staple of service life that action had to be taken to make tea breaks safer. In the Second World War, 37% of tank casualties were attributable to soldiers leaving the cover of their vehicle to brew up on an improvised petrol cooker, known as the Benghazi burner. They may have been gasping, but would you risk getting blasted for your cuppa?
Since 1945, every type of major armoured vehicle has been fitted with a boiling vessel (BV) which allows the crew to heat water and cook ration pouches by drawing power from the vehicle’s electrical supply. I know the huge morale boost this appliance brings, stuck in a broken down wagon in the middle of a prairie. It’s become such an essential that soldiers joke that if the BV is broken, the whole vehicle is unserviceable and they won’t want to leave base in it. And, if foreign suppliers expect the MoD to buy a bit of kit from them, they know better than to build it without an on-board kettle.
See British troops in Afghanistan receiving their Golden Jubilee tea tins from the Queen in 2012:
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