Charity says 9 in 10 personnel missed milestone moments: Watch reunions from our archive

When it comes to never-forget moments, being there for the birth of your child or attending your own wedding score high.

But SSAFA, the Armed Forces charity, has released new figures that show nine out of 10 (91%) serving personnel have missed a monumental life milestone because of their military service.

Seeing their child take their first steps (29%) topped the list, along with the birth of a new baby (21%), saying goodbye to a dying family member (21%) and missing funerals of close family (20%) and friends (18%).

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One in six (17%) have even missed their own wedding and had to reschedule as a result.

The research, released to mark Armed Forces Day 2026, highlights the stark sacrifices that UK's Armed Forces personnel make to serve King and country.

Reasons for serving spouses and partners missing these moments include deployments (27%), being stationed overseas (29%) or miles away from family and friends (27%) or attending training courses (32%).

BFBS Forces News has covered thousands of homecomings over the years – each one just as emotional as the last.

Our reporters have spoken to the loved ones of those who have returned after months away and been there when those returning have met their newborn baby for the first time.

In 2016, after four months in Kabul, Afghanistan, on Operation Toral with the 2 SCOTS battlegroup supporting the enduring Nato resolute support mission, Balaklava Company 5th Battalion The Royal Regiment of Scotland, returned to Glencorse Barracks in Scotland.

For one soldier, there was a special person waiting to meet him for the first time – his two-week-old son Caleb. 

Private Christopher Edgar's partner Laura Black brought their son to the homecoming, much to the soldier's delight.

Speaking to us in 2016, he said: "I'm just going to spend as much time with my wee boy as I can right now while I'm on leave.

"[It feels] amazing [to hold him]. I just couldn't wait for this moment. 

"I've just seen him on the computer so it's good to actually hold him for the first time.

"I'm absolutely buzzing." 

However, it's also the families of the personnel left behind who shoulder sacrifices of a different kind too.

Type 23 frigate HMS Portland returned home in March 2017 after sailing 40,000 miles conducting counter narcotics operations and maritime security missions in choke-holds like the Strait of Hormuz and the Bab El-Mandeb Strait. 

At the vessel's homecoming, LAET Matthew Chapman's partner Kate Rickard brought their newborn daughter to meet him for the first time.

LAET Chapman explained that being away for the first seven weeks of her life had been "massively difficult" and his partner was looking forward to sharing the hard work of being a parent.

Speaking with us in 2017, she said: "I had to do all the feeds and just had to be mum and dad at the same time.

"I'm glad he's back." 

Partners of serving personnel and veterans confessed they've experienced loneliness (44%), isolation (28%), interrupted career progression (33%) and almost a quarter feel a loss of identity (24%).

Missing family and friends (36%), parenting alone (33%) and frequent relocations (24%) rank highly as some of the hardest challenges military families face as a result of their loved one's service.

For more than a third (35%) being unable to make plans in advance and the unpredictability (26%) were also tough situations military families find themselves in. 

Yet, despite navigating these major sacrifices, nearly three-quarters (73%) feel the sacrifices are worth it to see their serving person defend their country and wear their uniform with pride (75%).

Meanwhile, 72% are grateful for the opportunities the military provides and are proud to belong to the wider Armed Forces community (73%).

While military family life does bring its challenges, more than a third (34%) of partners of military personnel say they fully appreciate the time they spend together as a family. 

Access to independent support through charities (29%), seeing how resilient their children are (26%) and having the opportunity to live in different places around the country (24%) were also highlights.

Although the majority (84%) of those living in the South East mark Remembrance Day, only 56% celebrate Armed Forces Day, with just 42% of those who do realising the day marks an opportunity to show support for serving personnel and their wider families.

Given this, it's unsurprising that more than half (52%) of Armed Forces families often feel unseen by members of the public. 

Almost seven in 10 (71%) of those living in the South East agree that the sacrifices veterans and serving personnel and their families (73%) make are not recognised enough and more should be done to celebrate our Armed Forces (70%) and their families (70%).  

In response to these findings, SSAFA is calling on the British public to honour military families and their sacrifice this Armed Forces Day.  

Activities will be taking place up and down the country over the weekend as Armed Forces Day is celebrated on Saturday 27 June. 

Members of the public can participate in or donate to SSAFA's flagship 13 Bridges event in London or visit the SSAFA Hampshire Branch stand at the Aldershot Armed Forces Weekend Event.

Lynne Doherty, Director of Social Care Operations at SSAFA, the Armed Forces charity, said: "Military families can often be the unsung heroes many don't see and SSAFA is here to support them whether that's practically or emotionally.

"Simply providing a supportive, listening ear when families feel there is nowhere else or no-one else to turn to whilst they quietly navigate frequent challenges can make a huge difference.  

"This Armed Forces Day, we want to take the opportunity to bring people together to celebrate and champion the entire military community by encouraging the public to get involved in family focused events, whether that's participating in or donating to our flagship 13 Bridges walk in London or virtually in locations across the country."

Last year, SSAFA helped more than 50,000 veterans, serving personnel and their families by providing non-judgemental, tailored support in any way and at any time that they need it to ensure that no-one ever battles alone.

To volunteer or fundraise for SSAFA, or to seek support, visit the SSAFA website and search for 'SSAFA near me'.  

The research was conducted by Censuswide to 3,000 respondents between 21 and 27 May 2026 – 2,000 nationally representative UK consumers (including 276 from the South East region) and 1,000 respondents who are spouses/partners of current serving personnel or veterans.